The right question: how to ask the tarot

The cards answer whatever you ask. That sounds obvious, but it determines everything that follows: a vague question gets a vague answer, a question about other people leads nowhere, and a yes-or-no question shrinks 78 images down to a single syllable. Here you’ll find out how to phrase a question so that the reading really shows you something.

Why the question matters so much

Think of the reading as a conversation. If you ask a wise friend “Will it work out?”, you’ll get a shrug. If you ask “What am I overlooking in this project right now?”, you’ll get an answer you can build on. It’s much the same with tarot: the question decides which lens you look at the cards through. The clearer the lens, the sharper the picture.

There’s a second point, too. While you are phrasing the question, you are already sorting things out. Often you realise along the way what it’s really about. The question “Should I hand in my notice?” turns out to be “Why don’t I dare to talk to my boss?”, and that is already half a step.

Four rules for good questions

1. Open rather than yes or no

Questions that begin with “Will”, “Should” or “Is ... going to” call for a yes or a no. Tarot can deliver that, and we even have a dedicated spread for it. But in doing so you give away almost everything the cards have to offer. Questions beginning with “What”, “How”, “What for” and “What should I focus on” work better: What does this relationship need right now? How do I deal with the pressure at work? What should I pay attention to in this decision?

2. About you, not about other people

“What does he feel for me?” is one of the most common tarot questions and one of the weakest. You can’t see inside another person, and neither can the cards. What you can ask instead: What do I need in this connection? What is stopping me from asking him directly? How do I deal with the uncertainty? These questions revolve around the only person you are able to change.

3. Specific rather than vague

“What lies ahead of me?” is so broad that every card fits and none of them helps. Narrow it down: time frame, area of life, situation. “What matters most in my studies over the next four weeks?” gives the cards a frame, and gives you an answer you can check.

4. With an attitude that wants to act

The best questions end, in your mind, with “so that I can”. What do I need to understand so that I can decide? What can I contribute so that the conversation goes well? That way the reading doesn’t stop at description but leads to a step.

Questions you should spare yourself

There are subjects where tarot has no business. Not because the cards are too weak for them, but because the consequences are too serious to hang on an image.

Illness and health: Whether a test result will turn out well, whether you should have a treatment, whether a symptom is harmless: that is for a doctor to clarify, not a card. What you can ask: How do I deal with my fear of the result?
Death: Questions about when someone will die, whether you or anyone else, lead nowhere except to fear. Incidentally, the card “Death” almost never means physical death, but a farewell that makes room.
Lawsuits, contracts, authorities: Whether you’ll win a case, whether you should sign, whether you are entitled to something: that is what lawyers and advice centres are for. At most, the cards can show you how you handle the stress.
Investments: No card knows how a share price will move. Anyone who makes decisions that way is gambling, and with poor odds.

Examples: weak question, better question

Weak: “Does she still love me?” Better: “What can I do so that we can talk to each other honestly again?”
Weak: “Will I get the job?” Better: “How can I come across in the interview in a way I can stand behind?”
Weak: “When will things finally get better?” Better: “What can I already do for myself now, even if the circumstances aren’t changing yet?”
Weak: “What does my father think of me?” Better: “What do I need in order to be at peace with my father, regardless of what he thinks?”
Weak: “Should I move?” Better: “What do I gain, what do I leave behind, and what does that tell me about what I really want?”

How often can the same question go on the table?

Once. If you lay out the same question a second time on the same day, you’re not really looking for insight but for a more pleasant answer. You can tell because the second reading never reassures you; it just leads to a third.

What does make sense is asking the same question again after a few weeks, once something has changed. Then you compare two snapshots and see what has moved. Or you ask a follow-up question that builds on the first reading: “The cards showed me withdrawal. What would a withdrawal look like that does me good?” That isn’t laying the cards again, it’s going deeper.

And what if you don’t like the answer at all? Then write it down, leave it for a while and look at it again in three days. Often the uncomfortable part is exactly what you wanted to know.

A small exercise

Write down the question that’s on your mind in a single sentence. Check it against the four rules: open, about you, specific, geared towards action. Rephrase it until all four apply. Only then draw your cards. You’ll notice that the reading feels different, because you already know beforehand what you’re looking for.